TheStyleGeek.com

The other day, a friend asked me if I would train her to use Twitter.  She seemed to think that since I work on the Interwebs 40 hours a week, I must be good at social media.  And maybe she’s right. I might be decent at managing my online identity–and even attracting people to follow me (still amazed that 420 people actually care what I have to say on Twitter or that you lovely folks read this blog); but just like  everyone else, I’ve made my share of mistakes online.

So, in an attempt to save all of you from committing some of my past sins, here’s a list of my top social media recommendations:

1.) If you’re going to Tweet at a celebrity, make sure you use the 140-characters to demonstrate your razor sharp wit. Anything less just seems desperate.

2.) No one cares what you want to eat, are eating or just ate. Unless it’s some sort of animal reproductive organ. But that will (hopefully) repulse more followers and friends than it will attract.  So yeah. Just don’t do it.

3.) LinkedIn is a professional website.  If your Twitter stream posts to your LinkedIn page, make sure you only Tweet resume-quality stuff. And make sure it’s all spelled correctly. Most employers find good grammar to be an asset. (And you don’t want to work for the ones who don’t.)

4.) I know the 240 people you’re connected with on Facebook are labeled as “Friends”, but really, that’s more of a technical term. You wouldn’t call all 240 of us to vent about what a skank your ex-boyfriend’s new girlfriend is, so there’s no need to post it as your status. Trust me, this makes you look bad, not her.

5.) When it comes to trending Twitter Topics, proceed with caution.  As I type, Keith Sweat and #babymakingsong are trending, and I guarantee I’d lose a few followers and even more credibility if I were to join in on that conversation.  Unless of course I brought out my razor sharp wit.  That is the Twitter Trump Card. (Sidenote: Someone should tell @RealChuckie that Keith’s song is one word. His version makes it seem like the title of a CSI episode; and also, the fact that this dude has nearly 200,000 followers pretty much answers the question of what’s wrong with  America’s youth.)

6.) Know who follows you and why.  I use Facebook to connect with people I actually know in real life. Many of relatives, friends from elementary school and even some of my mom’s friends have friended me on Facebook, so when I made a snarky comment about Tina Fey the other day, only one person commented.  In the future, I’ll save the snark for places where people expect it from me (this blog and Twitter) and use Facebook as a way for people to keep tabs on me (eg- stalk out my pictures to see if I’ve had a baby, gained an inordinate amount of weight or been stricken with a bad case of adult acne).

7.) Limit profanity. Don’t be crass. Don’t show your wiener. You would think this is self-explanatory. The news tells us this is not.

A recent poll showed that 18 percent of people regret posting something on the Internet.  Personally, I thought this number was a bit low.  Clearly they did not survey politicians  (see above recommendation).  Here’s my personal litmus test for posting something on a social media site: If it’s something you’d be annoyed or offended to read on someone else’s wall, you’re probably not cool enough to post it on yours.

I’ve been blogging for almost a year now.  What started out as a Blogspot blog and a way to more fully express my thoughts, found its way to WordPress and became a brand and (potential) business.  August 24th is my official blog-o-versary and over the next month and a half, I’ll be taking some time to reflect on where I’d like The Style Geek to go in year two.

While I could look at the past year’s failures–HELLO, I haven’t posted in 19 days–I’d rather not.  Instead, I’m going to focus on the progress I’ve made over the past 12 months and set some goals for the next 12.

Speaking of goals, has anyone read Never Eat Alone by Keith Ferrazzi?  If not, buy it now and read it fast.  For those of you who don’t know Ferrazzi, he’s a business networking guru who has topped “Who’s Who” lists in Forbes and Inc. magazine, written a NYT bestseller and  made a career of helping others and building relationships.

In the book, Ferrazzi talks about creating an Action Plan.  The Action Plan consists of two lists: one for long term goals and one for short term actions that will help you accomplish the long term goals.  (Sometimes the biggest reason we lack motivation and direction is that we haven’t taken the time to clearly articulate where we want to go.)

Here’s some questions to ask when you’re creating your Action Plan:

Where do you want to be in five years? Where do you want to be in one year? What actions can you take in the next 90 days to move closer to those five year/one year goal? Who do you know that can help you reach your goals? Who do you want to get to know in order to reach your goals? Most importantly, who can you mentor or whose career can you help further in the process of furthering your own career?

Confused?  Here’s a glimpse at my list and how I answered these questions:

In five years, I want to have an established, successful freelance writing career.  In one year, I want to have written at least one article for a major publication.  In the next 9o days, I want to add one clip to my writing portfolio. In order to accomplish my 90-day goal, I will need to do the following:

• Blog at least three times a week
• Identify three local, three regional and three national publications that I would like to write for
• Make a list of potential story ideas for each of those publications
• Find the contact information for certain editors at those publications
• Figure out if there are people I know who might have a connection to someone at those publications

The first publication that comes to mind is my local newspaper.  One of my co-workers used to work at the local newspaper. Action item number one will be to ask my co-worker who I should contact about freelancing at the paper.  If he gives me the name of someone specific, I will ask if it’s alright to mention HIS name to that person.  Then, I will craft an email or put in a phone call to the appropriate person at the local paper.  And just like that, I’ve made progress toward my goal.

The bottom line is that it’s never too late to start working towards your goals.  Ferrazzi made a lot of mistakes on his way to the top. I myself am nowhere near the top and have made more mistakes than I can count.  But the real mistake would be giving up.  The ones who lose, or even worse, the ones who end up spending their life doing something they’re not passionate about, are the ones who don’t try, who don’t persevere, who don’t set goals.

Image courtesy of http://www.despair.com/

Just got home from a networking event for creative and marketing types. By and large, I don’t find networking events in my area to be all that productive for my personal business (people are generally too concerned with promoting themselves to care about what i do), so tonight I decided to implement the principle of being present discussed in my previous post. (Interestingly enough, Gwen referenced a post about this very same topic today.)

Lo and behold, I actually enjoyed the event much more as a result of concentrating on others instead of worrying about myself.  I also learned about a really cool wine event that I probably wouldn’t have learned about had I been talking so much.

But alas, my (improved) listening skills are not the point of this post.  This post is about image.  More specifically, it’s about how you brand yourself through your personal appearance.

Two women spoke at the event I attended.  The first woman wore a grey Banana Republic dress that I recognized from a few years back with adorable chunky beads.  She looked to be in her mid-50s, and I found myself hoping that I look like her in 20-plus years.  I listened to every word woman number one said.

The second woman who spoke wore black capri pants with horribly visible granny-panties underneath, a blue tank top that was two sizes too small, wedge sandals and a black suit coat that didn’t quite match the theme of the capris and wedgies.  Woman number two gave a nice presentation; but I found myself getting distracted by her frumpy appearance.

So ladies, gentlemen and all aspiring public speakers, here’s a lesson for you: Spend time on your outfit, not just your speech.

Need a few pointers on how to put together the right ensemble? A well-edited outfit should have the following elements:

• Fit- If you see bumps, lumps or rolls poking out from any part of your outfit, consider going up a size.  To quote my favorite style mentor, Tim Gunn, it’s about fit, not a number on a tag.
• Theme- Before you head out the door, it’s important to consider where you’re going.  You’d dress differently for a backyard bbq than you would for work or a wedding, right? RIGHT?? If your shoes say walk on the beach, your blazer says business lunch and your pants say party, you should probably consider the theme of the event your about to attend–and reconsider your outfit.

Still don’t know what to wear? Might I suggest purchasing one–or more–of the great style books on the market?

A Guide to Quality, Taste and Style by Tim Gunn

The New Secrets of Style by the editors of InStyle magazine

The Little Black Book of Style by Nina Garcia

*Picture licensed under CC license 3.0

Have I confessed my love of business and self-help books to you? If not, consider this my official declaration.  The latest book in my reading queue is Get Noticed…Get Referrals by Jill Lublin.

In the book, Lublin asserts that building relationships–and helping others build relationships–is the key to building your business. She says that a person who is genuinely interested in getting to know other people–regardless of what he/she might get out of it–is more likely to get hired or get referrals from the people he/she has built relationships with than someone who is only looking to get to know others because they think the connection will benefit their business. One of the key relationship building techniques Lublin suggests? Listening to others and being present in conversations.

Now, all of this seems like common sense, right? Until you put it into practice.

At church this past Sunday, I gave the notion of being present in my conversations a test run. Sadly, I was surprised how often I had to remind myself to actually listen to what the person I was talking to was saying and not look around at who was walking by or entering the building.  Even worse, I think the woman I was talking to wasn’t really listening to me either, as she herself kept pausing and looking past me while we were conversing!

What if one of us had been asking the other to enter into a multi-million dollar business deal? A bit of a stretch, I know; but chances are, we’d have missed the opportunity.

So, my challenge to myself–and all of you–this week, is to try to listen and be fully present in the conversations you are having.  Maybe you’ll make a business connection, maybe you won’t; but at least you’ll walk away knowing you were there.

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Last week, social media and branding guru Dan Schawbel posted an article on Social Media Today about 30 Dangerous Personal Branding Habits. I was saddened, but not necessarily surprised, to see that I have fallen into many of them.  So, in an effort to change my bad branding habits and help you avoid them altogether, I’m going to list some of my worst branding offenses and tell you how I plan to cure them…

Bad Brand Habit #1- Letting myself be overwhelmed by inactivity

According to Schawbel, this habit is largely due to unclear priorities and disorganization.  When I decided to officially make a go of this whole starting my own business thing, I made sure to clearly state what I do as a social branding consultant as well as make a one-month road map for how I’m going to work on building my business.  Items in that road map include: attending local networking events, working pro bono with two businesses in exchange for reviews of my work and portfolio pieces, and building my Facebook fan page.  It’s useless to know where you want to go if you don’t know how to get there.

Bad Branding Habit #2- Not delivering on promises, or just things I said I would do

How many times have I promised you guys that I’d “write more tomorrow”?  And what happened to Tech Tuesdays and Fashion Fridays? When you over-promise and under-deliver, you lose the trust of your readers, clients, etc.  From now on, I’m going to be much more selective about what I say I’m going to do…and then make sure I actually do it!

Bad Branding Habit #3- Aiming for quantity, not quality

There are different schools of thought on how often you should make a blog post if you want to build a following.  I try to make a post three times a week, but quite frankly, many of the posts I make are not my best work.  On the other hand, my friend Mary, who runs a fabulous music blog, posts only once a week (Mondays); but I know that every post she makes is well-researched and helps me discover a new artist that I probably wouldn’t have known about before.  The bottom line is that no matter how often I make a post, I need to make sure I’m adding value to you as the reader.

Bad Branding Habit #4- Not dressing the part

Since my “name” is The Style Geek and part of my “product” is personal styling services, dressing the part is particularly important in branding myself.  Sadly, I sometimes get lazy in the mornings and don’t always make enough time to put on makeup or do my hair.  So, I’m going to start going to bed and getting up 30 minutes earlier each day so that I have no excuse but to put my best face forward.  Remember: Whatever YOUR line of work is, it’s important that you look the part.

Bad Branding Habit #5- Lacking focus

No matter how much I might want to, I will never be all things to all people…and my blog and business won’t either.  As a social branding consultant, I offer freelance writing and editing services, individual and small group public speaking training and strategic marketing and branding consultancy.  As a stylist, I offer personal shopping, styling and closet organization services.  My blog will now center around those topics. That’s it. Nothing more, nothing less.

Obviously, these are only five of the 30 bad branding habits on Schawbel’s list; and I’ve broken more than just the ones I’ve written about.  Fortunately, it’s never too late to start over.  If your brand has fallen into some of these bad habits, join me in reversing the damage that’s been done and working towards growth!

Why don’t we pursue our dreams? Is it because we’re afraid of failing? Not enough money? Worried we’ll looking stupid?

Do we even know what our dreams are? Or did we lose them somewhere along the line when jobs or marriage or children got in the way?

When I was in high school, I told my friends and family that I wanted to be Katie Couric one day.  Like any good support network should, my loved ones assured me that my dream was attainable and I’d be anchoring The Today Show in no time.  I’m not sure when I lost sight of that dream.  Somewhere in college, and I think it had to do with a boy.

After graduation, I enjoyed a few years of success as a magazine editor but gave it up to pursue my ultimate dream of being happily married.  Two years later, married, living in California and at a career crossroads, I wouldn’t change the choices I’ve made.  Still, the questions “why not me” and “why not now” –or however that saying goes– have been haunting me lately.

I don’t want to look back on my life and realize that I wasn’t brave enough to go after what I wanted.  I’ve been evaluating “things” lately and I’ve decided that there’s really no good reason why I’m not actively pursuing my dreams…whatever form they may now be in.

Do I feel prepared? HECK NO! Am I worried I’ll fail? ABSOLUTELY! Am I gonna do it anyhow? YOU’RE DARN RIGHT, I AM!

So, what does all this mean?  Well, this means that I’m officially announcing my pursuit of a career as a social brand consultant…with some personal styling services on the side.  Over the next few weeks I’ll be unveiling bits and pieces of my “plan” (or lack thereof), but for now you can check out the About Me and Daily Inspiration pages for more information.

For those of you who have successfully started your own business, I’d love to hear some of your war stories, tips and suggestions.  For those of you who have been supportive of me and this blog all along…THANK YOU! I’m gonna need a lot more of it in the days, weeks and months to come.  For those of you who want to pursue a dream of your own…why not you? Why not now?

*Image used under CC License 2.0